Brian Vs. Utah
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Real Salty: If I Were A Mosquito On The Wall...

Real Salty: If I Were A Mosquito On The Wall...

That 4-0 scoreline at Cbus was awful. So to try and figure out what is happening next with RSL we decide to roleplay what Ryan Smith and David Blitzer might be thinking.

Real Salty: RSL Can’t Get The Hell Away From Their Own Goal

This Just In: We still can’t score. Okay, that’s not breaking news but what is, is that we started two younguns Saturday at Columbus. According to our guy Ron Kickenschleigen … I’ll just let him tell you his thoughts on the game:

Wrong team yet again, but we had a meeting with this guy and we promise this will never happen again. If it does he’s gonna have to go back to calling his kids games on Twitch.

Speaking of kids, Brian noticed that the RSL back line made Aidan Morris look like a world-class superstar in his “victory gold.” Sheena doesn’t understand why Andrew Brody “can’t figure out what color jersey he’s supposed to be kicking towards.”

Halftime: Brody looks lost out there, according to Sheena—even in the attack. Brian agreed, but added that without the services of Bryan Oviedo at left back there hasn’t been good service on that left wing, due in part to a mishmash of faces on that side of the field.

Good things aren’t going to happen, said Sheena when you “can’t defend” and that caused her to “really miss [Aaron] Herrera,” who was of course traded to Montreal.

To that end, Sheena thought RSL head coach Pablo Mastroeni’s squad has lacked “energy” and “because you put some poorly trained and [not] experienced players on the field … I really haven’t seen the money spent to bring that back up.”

In Sum: Everyone is wondering what’s going to happen next with this team. For two weeks running there has been neither a sense of communication nor cohesion in any phase of play.

So Brian thought back to a time when he was having troubles with his students and thought it would be fun if he and Sheena roleplayed to begin the final segment. With 1-4-1 Charlotte FC slated to be in town this Saturday it’s still not time to “throw the baby out with the bath water,” said Brian.

On social media, RSL co-owner Ryan Smith showed surprise at the 4-0 scoreline in Columbus. “Oh, wow,” he said rather cryptically. So Sheena and Brian had a role-playing session in which Sheena was Ryan and Brian was co-owner David Blitzer to talk Ryan out of being too rash in what we can only assume was his judgment.

Anyway, Brian said “let the game be played” Saturday in spite of all the snow, cold and muck. Besides, Charlotte FC waters their own turf field—per our roving reporter Ron:

Finally: That’s kind of like driving race cars on a rainy track—it’s counterproductive. But so is the way in which RSL is playing, right now.

Next up: Vs Charlotte FC, Saturday.

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Brian Vs. Utah
BVU Show
Utah sports insider news too hot for newspapers, radio and TV